Sunday, May 31, 2015

The Best BAD Query Contest #bestbadquery #bestbadpitch

The day has come! Today is the Best BAD Query Contest 2015, now with #bestbadpitch.

Here is how to play:

1) Sign up on the linky below
2) Post your TERRIBLE query and 35 word pitch on your blog (or however many words you feel need to follow guidelines here). If you wish, also tweet your pitch with the #bestbadpitch tag. All entries must be posted by midnight CST/ 1am EST.
3) Come back to between 6/2 and 6/5 to vote for your favorite.
4) The winner will be posted here on 6/8.

You can tweet as many #bestbadpitch tweets as you like, and you don't have to be an official entrant to do so. Only bad pitches on an official blog entry are counted toward the contest, but tweeting for fun is encouraged! :)

The winner will get a $25 Amazon gift card and the honor of sucking it up the most in 2015! 

This contest is all about FUN! It's not about being mean to anyone, including yourself! So that means no real queries or pitches and no basing your query or pitch on a real book or author. You must write a query and pitch from scratch using all your backwards creative juices to make it a real stinker.

I'm not an official entrant, but I want to play. I used The Top Ten Query Mistakes from Rachelle Gardner to help. That's right, I actually researched how to suck.


To Whom It May Concern:

I've been writing since I was 2 and have been published in thousands of countries of the world. I have a yellow belt in pilates and have been to Spain.

I write this book beacuse there are no books about dragons. My son always says he wants book about dragins. I have always known I should be a author and last night I dreamed I had signed million of books, so it mist be ture. ROFLMAO

When my book is a movie, it should have Taylor Swift. I know she doesn't act, but she looks pefect. This book can be a series or a movie or tv. Whatever you want.

I have alreay written 500 pages aso you now it must be good. In my life and I have wirtten a million pages. Please contact me about publishing or movie.

Thank you,
Sally Weirdo

And here are some ways to screw up a pitch: Top 5 Twitter Pitch Mistakes


A beautiful dragon. A sexy night. Destiny to save the world. I've been to Spain. #bestbadpitch

Even I don't know what that means... lol


  1. Wow! Your research really, um, paid off?

  2. How could they not want it! A book about dragins? I've never read one of those! I've never been to Spain, but I think that because you have that your book will be even more amazing.